Kaila and I....and tender hearts!

Kaila and I are going do something together today that we are both excited about....we're going to the movie, to see High School Musical 3. It's been way to long since we've done something like this together, so we're looking forward to it! Bless her heart, she is so much like me, and I have been thinking about her and praying for her, specifically because of her tender heart, and I'm sure my mom and my sister will find this quite humorous, because anyone who knows me knows I am just as tender-hearted.....that's where she gets it! Anyways, I see her react to things and want so much to help her with it, but my goodness, I struggle with it myself and I really have been so much more here lately. Maybe because I have been praying about it. And here's the thing...one day this week, I really let something get to me, so I went walking. Poor Daron....I think I was gone awhile, but in that time, all I could do was pray and really talk with God about what was on my mind, even at one point I was upset that I was so upset and I prayed, with tears streaming down my face, "Lord, please change my tender heart. I don't want it to be tender anymore." And, immediately, He started talking back to me... first in a song. Until I went to the Women of Faith conference this summer, I didn't listen to Natalie Grant a whole lot, just a few songs here and there, but she was at the conference, and when I got home, I bought her latest CD Relentless for one song, but ended up liking many more that won't make it to radio. One of the songs is "Back at My Heart," and it's the one I listened to and feel like I could have written it. The chorus says, "Meanwhile back at my heart, I'm desperate for all the You are, Undo me and take me apart. Meanwhile, back at my soul, Mend me, Lord, please make me whole, You know just where to start, Back at my heart." And then, it was clear to me that He made me, knows everything about me, knows who I am and who He wants me to be, and yes, my tender heart does need to change...but not the way I was thinking. I need to be so much less tender for things that affect me, and more tender for the needs of people around me...that I know and don't know, because that is how I am going to be effective at anything in my daily life. So, daily, I have to make this choice, and I know it will take some time, but I know He is the healer of hearts, He is all that I need, to quote another song, "His grace is enough." And, hopefully, Kaila will see this example in me and will feel blessed to have a tender heart, because I am thankful for mine.